Enough About Eve is the sixth episode of the third season and the 49th overall.
When it comes to family, we're all still children at heart. No matter how old we get, we always need a place to call home. Because without the people you love most you can't help but feel all alone in the world. Fortunately, misery loves company. Well, for now at least.
Vanessa, hoping to finally win her difficult activist mother Gabriela's approval, desperately vies with Blair for the honor of delivering the freshman toast at NYU. Meanwhile, Dan invites Olivia to meet Rufus and Lily, which leads to all sorts of problems for the new couple. Elsewhere, Serena and Nate team up to help Carter win money at a poker table to free him from his arrangement with the Buckleys; but Nate has a different plan in mind.
The episode begins with Blair dreaming herself into All About Eve. In the scene, she's seated next to Chuck and she's acting as Bette Davis. She witnesses the speaker introduce Vanessa as the one to give an important toast. Afterwards, she wakes up and upsettingly tells Chuck about the dream. Chuck reasons that it's about her problems at NYU and promises that one day she will successfully rule the school. Blair then gets up and reminds herself that she is Audrey Hepburn as motivation. At Tripp's campaign headquarters, Nate explains to Serena that a House seat opened up in Manhattan and William wants Tripp to run. Nate admits that he's volunteering because he's taking the Buckley attack ads personally. He also reveals to Serena that the Buckley family are sending Carter to work out his debt on one of the family oil rigs, but he suspects that they're more interested in getting Carter out with a bunch of roughnecks than they are in seeing him work. He continues that he has an idea to help make sure it doesn't happen.
At the loft, Jenny reads an article about Vanessa's activism and Dan mentions that she's a shoo in to give the freshman toast at Parent's Weekend at NYU. Vanessa explains that Josh Ellis, the alumnus who chooses the speaker, called and said it's between her and another girl, but she feels she probably won't get it. Rufus asks if she's inviting her parents, and Vanessa sadly replies that her parents hate that she's at a private college but that it would be amazing if they did come. Rufus promises him and Dan will be there, but Dan says Olivia is coming home and he wanted to spend time with her. Rufus tells him to invite her, but Dan is hesitant as he doesn't want to move too quickly in the relationship. Jenny and Vanessa encourage him to invite her anyway. Elsewhere, Nate tells Serena that Bree's cousin PJ Buckley plays poker and that they can probably get him to play for Carter. Serena is skeptical, saying it's a long shot for them to play something as big as what Carter owes. Nate says that they've bet bigger things, such as the New York Knicks, and Bree told him that everyone at the table tells and it's obvious when to call a bluff. He also tells her that since PJ hates him, she'll have to play.
At NYU, Blair's minions read her the article on Vanessa. The girls then run into her, where she informs Blair that Josh Ellis just called offering her the toast. Outside, Olivia gives Dan a souvenir from Tokyo, where she just returned from. Dan invites her to the freshman dinner, and she excitedly immediately accepts. In her dorm, Vanessa leaves a message for her parents inviting them to the dinner. Also in her dorm, Blair is planning her speech. Confused, her minions remind her that Vanessa is giving the toast. Blair tells them that she won't be for long. Meanwhile, Josh Ellis receives a call from Olivia, who tells him she wants to accept his offer to give the toast. Josh tells her that another girl was being considered but they hadn't committed to her yet and definitely want Olivia.
At Josh Ellis' office, Blair tells him that Vanessa is not the right choice to get donation money. He informs her that Olivia just accepted the toast after originally rejecting the offer and that luckily Dan convinced her to do it. Blair drops the hint that maybe her schedule might change, but Josh confirms that even if it did, Vanessa would still be the next choice. Blair leaves and runs into Vanessa outside his office. She reveals to Vanessa that Olivia is giving the toast now, not her. Vanessa, realizing that she was the one who told Dan to bring her, tries to come up with ways to get it back but Blair finds holes in each option. Meanwhile, Nate and Serena arrive at PJ's poker game. PJ is surprised to see Nate and tells him there isn't a seat for him. Nate replies that he isn't playing, Serena is. He gives $25,000 as buy in money and PJ tells Serena to take a seat. At NYU, Vanessa tries to convince Dan to uninvite Olivia but is unsuccessful. As a last result, she lies and says Olivia is nervous about meeting Dan's parents. He thanks her for giving him a heads up. At the poker game, Serena is getting crushed by PJ but Nate encourages her to keep playing because PJ is on tilt. He buys back in, and Serena tells PJ she wants to play for Carter. PJ realizes she's Carter's girl and tells them his debt is worth a lot more than they're showing. Nate makes PJ an offer: if he plays Carter and wins, Nate will give him a scandalous photo of Tripp at his bachelor party. Serena mentions that if that picture would get it, it would cost Tripp the election, and Nate again tells her not to lose. After seeing the photo, PJ agrees to play.
At NYU, Olivia calls Josh to cancel. Vanessa overhears and asks if everything is okay. Olivia explains that Dan cancelled and wants to have a one on one date instead. Olivia asks if she should be worried, but Vanessa assures her not to. At that moment, Vanessa receives a call from Josh offering her the toast again. She then tells Blair's minion to tell Blair that she's giving the toast. The girl tells Blair, who is happy that her plan is falling into place. She calls Chuck, and asks him to revive their game from the summer because she has the perfect target. At the poker game, PJ asks what a girl like Serena is doing with Carter. Frustrated, Serena decides to put it all in and he asks if she's sure she wants to play this hand for Carter. Receiving the go ahead look from Nate, Serena says yes. They reveal their hands, and PJ wins and takes the picture. Surprised they lost, Nate and Serena leave. At the VDW penthouse, Vanessa and her mother Gabriela arrive to visit before the dinner. Lily tells Gabriela that NYU is the perfect place for Vanessa, and Gabriela disagrees, saying she doesn't believe in private schools because education should not be for sale. Lily and Rufus take this as a sign to change the subject. At a bar, Chuck and Blair are ready to play their game. She points out her target, Josh Ellis, and explains he needs to be humiliated for double crossing her. He agrees. At Tripp's campaign office, Nate and Serena prepare for next steps after their loss. Nate says he needs to tell William what happened and Serena offers to tell him herself to save Nate from getting into trouble. Nate replies that he doesn't want to drag her into the mess and goes off to take William's call privately. While he's gone, a campaign aide asks Serena to tell Nate that he has a phone call, PJ is on the line. Serena goes to tell him, and overhears Nate telling William that their plan went perfectly but that he feels bad about lying to Serena. He also mentions to his grandfather that he still has the real picture of Tripp. After hearing this, she leaves. At the VDW's, Gabriels makes rude remarks about NYU and Olivia, leaving Vanessa feeling frustrated. Olivia then calls, and asks why Dan changed his mind about letting her meet his parents. She decides just to ask him herself, and Vanessa lies and says Rufus and Lily think less of shallow celebrities and the dumbing down of society. Offended, Olivia tells Vanessa not to make excuses for Dan. Back at the bar, Chuck successfully seduces Josh but is surprised when he actually kisses him. Blair, witnessing the whole thing, runs in and calls Josh out. He quickly runs out and Blair follows. It's revealed that they made a deal that if Blair could get Chuck to kiss Josh, he would give her the toast and since he got what he wanted, Blair will now too. After Chuck leaves to go to a dinner, Blair calls Vanessa, who doesn't answer. At the VDW's, Gabriela promises Vanessa to keep an open mind about everything and Vanessa says her toast will help her understand why NYU is the right place for her. At the loft, after burning his special chicken, Dan asks Olivia if she just wants to go out instead. She suggests they just go to the parent's dinner, and Dan hesitantly agrees.
At the dinner, Blair informs Vanessa that she's giving the toast. Vanessa begs her not to do it and she has no idea what the speech means to her. Blair reminds her that she's better than her and walks off. Meanwhile, Dan and Olivia arrive and he introduces her to Rufus and Lily. Still offended by what Vanessa told her, Olivia begins to act like an arrogant stuck up celebrity. Chuck also arrives and finds out from one of Blair's minions about Blair's deal with Josh. Outside Tripp's campaign headquarters, Serena confronts Nate. He explains that the plan was to give PJ the fake photo and then when they release it, the van der Bilt's will release the real one and make the Buckley's look like the villains they are. Serena demands to know what will happen to Carter, and Nate replies that he deserves what he's getting after what he did. Serena then walks off and calls PJ. Annoyed at her behavior at the dinner, Dan asks Olivia what's going on. After they both share what Vanessa told them, they realize she manipulated both of them to get the toast. In another room, Vanessa confronts Blair about why she thinks she's so much better. Blair tears into Vanessa, her manipulation of Chuck, and the culture of NYU and is about to leave to give her toast when Vanessa pulls out a microphone and reveals that everyone heard exactly what Blair had to say. Panicking, Blair rushes out to find everyone did indeed hear every word. Seeing a saddened Chuck, Blair realizes she messed up. Seeing an angry Dan and Olivia, Vanessa realizes she messed up too. She tries to explain, but Olivia says all Vanessa had to do was ask for it. While explaining, she tells them she wishes Rufus and Lily were her parents, and Gabriela overhears. Blair goes to look for Chuck but instead finds Lily, who tells her that Chuck would have never refused anything Blair asked for. She advises her to give Chuck some time to clear his head and she can talk to him the next day.
At the Waldorf penthouse, Carter comes to see Serena. He tells her he's leaving, but she tells him she settled his debt with the Buckley's by saving them from a public fiasco. Carter is slightly put off, saying it was his debt to settle not her's, and he wanted to take responsibility for his actions. He admits he would rather Serena hate him than feel sorry for him and leaves a devastated Serena behind. At the dinner, Vanessa tries to apologize to Gabriela, who tells her to consider the person NYU is turning her into. Elsewhere, Dan and Olivia explain her behavior Rufus and Lily. Before they can tell the whole story, Josh calls Olivia to give the toast. Before she can head up, some fans come and ask for a picture and autographs. While watching her head onstage, Blair and Vanessa ask each other why they took things too far.The next day, Olivia goes to breakfast at the VDW penthouse. Rufus says Dan explained everything and they understand. Olivia tells an anecdote about John Travolta, and after seeing reactions, plays off that she's kidding but tells Dan she wasn't. At The Palace, Blair goes to see Chuck seeking forgiveness. She apologizes, and Chuck admits that it hurt being manipulated by her because the people she usually manipulates she has no respect for. At the coffee shop, Vanessa is waiting for her mother with a croissant when she gets a call from her saying she already left the city. Carter leaves for Texas with the Buckley's. Later, Blair also goes to the coffee shop and Vanessa offers the croissant and empty seat to Blair, who thanks her and accepts.
- Blake Lively as Serena van der Woodsen
- Leighton Meester as Blair Waldorf
- Penn Badgley as Dan Humphrey
- Chace Crawford as Nate Archibald
- Taylor Momsen as Jenny Humphrey
- Ed Westwick as Chuck Bass
- Jessica Szohr as Vanessa Abrams
- Kelly Rutherford as Lily van der Woodsen
- Matthew Settle as Rufus Humphrey
- Hilary Duff as Olivia Burke
- Sebastian Stan as Carter Baizen
- Neal Bledsoe as Josh Ellis
- Gina Torres as Gabriela Abrams
- Shane McRae as PJ Buckley
- "Achin' to B" by The Replacements
- "Home" by Edward Sharpe & Magnetic Zeros
- "I'm in Love with Your Rock 'n' Roll" by Kish Mauve
- "We're All the Same" by Meeting Places
- "Wings Undone" by Meeting Places
- "Strangers" by Dirty Secrets
- "Unfinished Business" by White Lies
- "The Gentle Rain (RJD2 Remix)" by Astrudo Gilberto
Jenny (to Dan): People like you more when they meet our family.
Vanessa: It's true.
Blair (to Vanessa): See, thats where you and I are different. I would never put my fate in someone else's hands and that's why I always win and you lose. So, good luck with your honesty.
Vanessa (on Olivia): She's been in Japan for ten days, she's probably having reverse culture shock.
Dan: Okay, alright, do you have any, uh, non insane reasons?
PJ Buckley (to Serena): So what's a sweet girl like you doing with a guy like Carter Baizen? You heard what happened to my sister, right? Heartbroken, thirty pounds fatter.
Blair (before starting the game with Josh): I'll just go powder my nose for ten minutes?
Chuck: I only need five.
Josh: So do you have a boyfriend?
Chuck: ...not exactly.
Josh: I should call Vanessa and break the bad news.
Blair: Allow me. We're rivals... but friends at heart. Till tonight. OUT, you cable knit queen!
Blair: Are you upset because you kissed a guy?
Chuck: I'm upset because I kissed somebody who wasn't you. Do you really think I've never kissed a guy before?
Olivia (to Dan about Rufus and Lily): So, do you think they're going to want my autograph?
Blair (to Vanessa on why she's better than her): Do you really want to know? Everything. Generations of breeding and wealth had to come together to produce me, I have more in common with Marie Antoinette than with you. And granted, you may be popular at some step ivy safety school but the fact is the rabble is still rabble and they need a queen.
Vanessa: You stole the toast.
Blair: I was willing to do what was necessary, including lying to Chuck, the one person who trusts me more than anyone. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to give my toast.
Vanessa: Actually, Blair, congratulations. You just did.
Rufus: Dan, was that Blair on the PA? She really should have run that speech past someone.
- The episode title is based off the movie All About Eve.